The Seventy-Thirty Theory
4 girls and 12 glasses of wine
My girls and I like to drink wine and talk about boys. Here are is our latest theory which we discussed at our last wine night. None of this is factual. This is solely what we (and the wine) believe.
Personalities are often classified as being “big” or “small”. Someone with a big personality would be someone who’s loud, who demands the attention of the room, someone opinionated and hard to forget. While someone with a small personality is someone who is passive, takes a back seat in conversation and allows things to happen to them. Us 4 are all big personalities and we think it’s more likely for girls to have big personality than guys.
Our big personalities bounce off each other well. They also make us extremely dateable. We’re good at conversation. We make guys feel comfortable. We come across and being confident and smart, guys dig that shit. We might not be exactly who we come across to be, but we are memorable and we are hard to get over. The thing about our big personalities is that it sometimes takes over our relationships without us knowing. Which is where The Seventy-Thirty Theory comes in.
We feel as though sometimes our personalities are so big that the guys we date and the relationships we’re in are dominated by us without us knowing. What I mean here is that we define the dynamics of the relationship and we contribute more to the relationship than our significant other. And I’m not referring to effort here. This has nothing to do with effort. It’s more about what makes the relationship the way it is. The conversations, the jokes, the plans, the mood. It’s Seventy-Thirty. 70% us, 30% him.
It’s not always Seventy-Thirty. Sometimes its Ninety-Ten. Sometimes its Sixty-Forty. And sometimes it’s even Fifty-Fifty, these are the best relationships/ dates.
When I realised that I am usually the Seventy part I began to feel very strange. Becoming aware of it made me wonder if I should start to take a step back. It made me feel like I enjoy the dates I go on because I enjoy my own company. That maybe I don’t like the guys I date but I like myself. Will I be the Seventy with everyone I date or will I find a Fifty to balance me out?
